HOTEL ROOM (1933) Night BEEFY Where is he? Where is he hiding? EVE I don't know. I've been looking for him since yesterday. BEEFY I'm gonna ask you for the last time. Where is he? EVE I don't know. What are you gonna do to him? BEEFY (TO THUG) Stay here in case that rat shows up. THUG Okay. BEEFY (TO EVE) Who you protecting, you dumb asshole? A stoolie who rats on his own friends? They were your friends too. TRIGGER I got it. You wanna end up like that bitch, huh? FAT MOE At Chun Lao's. Chinese theater. BEEFY (TO TRIGGER) You stay here with this barrel of shit. CHINAMAN Noodles. Noodles. Noodles. Easy, easy... TELEPHONE RINGS X 24 PROHIBITION COFFIN CHINAMAN This way. Hurry! There down. Mott Street. Go. Go. Go. FAT MOE Noodles. Noodles. Noodles. Untie me. NOODLES Stay that way. No, stay. I want them to know I did it. FAT MOE Where you going? NOODLES I'm gonna go get Eve. FAT MOE Don't. NOODLES Why? FAT MOE They... They already been there. Do you need anything? Money? NOODLES I got more than I need. FAT MOE Yeah, it's all yours now. TICKET SELLER Where to? Sir, where do you want to go? NOODLES Anywhere. First bus. TICKET SELLER Buffalo? NOODLES One way. TICKET SELLER That'll be $1.20 MUSIC - YESTERDAY NOODLES I wanna rent a car. TICKET SELLER (1968) Would you fill this out, please? FAT MOE Noodles. NOODLES I brought back the key to your clock. Lock the door. FAT MOE When did you get back? NOODLES Today. FAT MOE Why? NOODLES They got in touch with me. FAT MOE Who? NOODLES I thought you might know. FAT MOE Me? I don't know nothing about nobody no more. NOODLES You gonna offer me a drink? FAT MOE Yeah, forgive me. Sure. Of course. Please sit down. Who's Robert Williams? NOODLES I am. FAT MOE "We wish to inform you that following the sale of the Beth Israel Cemetery..." The synagogue sent these out if you wanted to relocate your loved ones. I got the same letter on account of my father. NOODLES Only the synagogue didn't send that. I got that last week. And the rabbi told me he sent those out about eight months ago. FAT MOE Yeah, that's right. That's about when I got mine. So, what else did the rabbi say? NOODLES He said I was lucky. The bodies of Philip Stein... ...Maximilian Bercovicz, Patrick Goldberg were already spoken for. And they were up in a very fancy cemetery in Riverdale. FAT MOE What's this all mean? NOODLES It means... ..."Noodles, though you've been hiding in the asshole of the world, we found you. We know where you are." It means... ..."Get ready." FAT MOE For what? NOODLES That's the one thing it didn't say. FAT MOE (winds clock) What do you think? NOODLES I think the answer's here. That's why I came back. FAT MOE I moved everything in here. I had to sell the house, the backroom. NOODLES I always thought you might have helped yourself to that million bucks. But now I know. Yeah You're on your ass worse than ever. FAT MOE But I thought it was you who... NOODLES No, you thought wrong. The suitcase was empty. FAT MOE Then who took it? NOODLES That's what I've been asking myself for 35 years. FAT MOE If it bothers you, I can sleep here. You can have my room. NOODLES No. It's okay. How's your sister? FAT MOE I ain't seen her for years. She's a big star now. NOODLES We should have known, huh? You can always tell the winners at the starting gate. You can always tell the winners, and you can tell the losers. Who would've put a penny on you? FAT MOE I'd have put everything I ever had on you. NOODLES Yeah, and you would've lost. FAT MOE Well, you're beat. Good night. NOODLES Good night, Moe. Thanks. FAT MOE What have you been doing all these years? NOODLES Been going to bed early. AMAPOLA. FAT MOE Deborah, Papa says you should help. DEBORAH No. FAT MOE We got customers all over. We can't do everything. DEBORAH Try. I've got my elocution lessons. Fat, you better spray the toilet. I saw a cockroach in there. NOODLES Sorry. DEBORAH & FRIENDS Sorry, I can't make it today. See you tomorrow Okay. Bye. Bye. NOODLES Sorry, Fats. PATSY Noodles! DOMINIC Bugsy's got a job for us. PATSY Hurry up. He don't wait. NOODLES Who you calling a cockroach? DEBORAH So, what are you? You're filthy, you make me sick. You crawl up toilet walls just like a roach. So, what are you? Let go! NOODLES I make you sick, huh? Then how come you showed me your tush? DEBORAH To a roach. Go look at yourself, David Aaronson. MIRROR NOODLES She don't leave me alone, I'm gonna give her what she's asking for. What's Bugsy want? PATSY We gotta wake up a deadbeat. COCKEYE That schmuck at the newsstand didn't pay. NOODLES Here's your money, sir. Beautiful. PATSY Look at it, it looks great! Wow! NOODLES Come on, guys. MONKEY Come on, come on. Now make up your mind. COCKEYE Noodles, let's take the dollar. DOMINIC Yeah. NOODLES Skip, here you go. That one. Him. OFF Hey, Sam, I'll see you next Thursday. NOODLES That one. MONKEY Are you nuts? NOODLES Bugsy said we could take the dollar or we could roll the drunk. MONKEY Yeah, but he ain't even drunk yet. DOMINIC We'll wait. MONKEY Well, you roll that one over there. NOODLES What's to roll? He drunk it all. Bounce that little shikker. Jacket. DOMINIC It's Fartface. NOODLES Shit! COCKEYE We should've took the dollar. PATSY Could've had 10 corned beef sandwiches on poppy-seed rolls. NOODLES Look, the wagon will hide us from Fartface. Get ready! Now! Throw your jacket over him. MAX Hey, mister, you sick? Poor guy, you'll be okay. Come on, I'll help ya. Come on, up you go. Now, you're worse than my Uncle Nathan. Why do you want to get soused? I'll take you home. Go, Mama. FARTFACE Stop right there. Hey, you! Yeah, I'm talking to you. What are you kids doing here? PATSY What are we kids doing here? NOODLES We're getting it up the ass. COCKEYE Yeah, getting screwed. Is there a law against it? DOMINIC Can you spare a dime for pisherkehs that just got it up the ass? FARTFACE Get out of here. Get off the street. Get out of here. Get off the street. Go ahead. And don't come back. I don't want to see you here again. All right? PATSY Hey, stop by for you later. NOODLES Yeah, but knock here on the john first. My old man's praying, and my old lady's crying. And the light's turned off. What the hell should I go home for? At least in here I can read. MARTIN EDEN PEGGY'S MOM (OFF) Where are you going? PEGGY (OFF) Mama, don't get worked up. PEGGY'S MOM (OFF) You got pots to clean. PEGGY (OFF) I'll be right back, Ma. I gotta go to the can. NOODLES Hi, Peggy. PEGGY At least you could lock the door. NOODLES Don't you like it? PEGGY I've seen better. NOODLES You seen lots? PEGGY How many you seen? I'll tell you how many. None. NOODLES Let me see yours. PEGGY Looksies, no feelsies. NOODLES Peggy... Peggy, I... You like it, don't you? PEGGY Not for free, I don't. Bring me a charlotte russe, and then you can do anything you like. NOODLES Tomorrow. I'll bring it to you tomorrow. I'll bring it tomorrow. PEGGY I don't give credit. NOODLES I promise. I promise. PEGGY You better stop squeezing me, or I'm gonna poop in my pants. Well, you getting out? MAX'S MUM Come on, come on. NOODLES Give me six copies. MAX Drop your pants and I'll stick it to you again. NOODLES What do you mean, "again"? MAX That's a long story. And look what time it is. It's already 6:34. And I gotta go. Boy, I got a lot of work to do. NOODLES Hold it a minute. Now it's 6:35. And I ain't got a damn thing to do. MAX Just you wait, asshole. I'll do something with your time. Wait! Hey! NOODLES Since we're talking about time... ...it looks like you're gonna break that lamp at 6:36. FARTFACE Where'd you pinch this? NOODLES It's mine. FARTFACE Prove it. MAX I gave it to him. FARTFACE Yeah? Who the hell are you? Where you from? MAX The Bronx. FARTFACE And you give away watches? MAX He's my uncle. FARTFACE And who gave it to you? MAX My Uncle Nathan. NOODLES My little brother. FARTFACE Tell your uncle to stop by the precinct. MAX He's dead. NOODLES Alcoholic. MAX In Kishnev, Poland. FARTFACE Then he don't need it no more. It's been requisitioned. MAX Requi...What's that mean? NOODLES Pinched, by him. At 6:37. FARTFACE Just remember, I got my eye on you two. MAX I got my eye on you too. Take it! Take it! Take the lamp off. I can't hold it. MAX'S MUM Max. Who's this? MAX My uncle. PATSY That one. With the cream. FAT MOE The 5-cent one? PATSY Yeah. For the twopenny one she only gives you a hand job. I can do that myself. Not that one! That one. FAT MOE You sure? PATSY Wrap it up pretty. Good morning. Peggy home? PEGGY'S MUM She's taking a bath. PATSY That's great. Would you tell her I'm here? PEGGY Hey, Ma. Another bucket of water. PEGGY'S MUM Wait. PATSY & THE CHARLOTTE RUSSE PEGGY What do you want? PATSY Me? PEGGY Mama said you were looking for me. PATSY No. The guys told me that... PEGGY What? PATSY I'll come back some other time. Noodles! Noodles! Noodles! Noodles! NOODLES Did you get it? MAX His asshole blinked, but we got him. Nice going, Fartface. And on duty too. FARTFACE You boys caught me with my pants down that time. NOODLES No, we caught you with your schmuck in a minor. MAX (TO PATSY) Put this someplace safe. FARTFACE That's all right. Hey, hold it! Where you going? Hold it! Wait a minute! Hey, you, stop! Hold it. What are you gonna do with that plate? NOODLES Depends. What time is it, Max? MAX I think it's time we got our watch back. FARTFACE Okay, boys, we're even. MAX The hell we are. NOODLES You'll be collecting your pension before we're even. PEGGY Hiya, fellas. FARTFACE What do you boys want? MAX First off... ...you're paying Peggy for us. FARTFACE Okay. That's it? MAX (TO NOODLES) Go ahead while I tell him. NOODLES I can't believe it. My first time, and a lousy cop's paying for it. FARTFACE Now, look, what else do you kids want for that plate? MAX Noodles was telling me about Bugsy. Seems he's boss, thanks to you. FARTFACE Meaning what? MAX Meaning he pays you off. PEGGY Will you slow down? What is your hurry? Take it easy. If you keep this up, you're gonna come too fast. Do you see what I mean? You're so stupid. I can't believe it. MAX So why does Bugsy pay you? What do you do for him? FARTFACE I close an eye once in a while. MAX Well, now you close an eye for us. FARTFACE Why? What are you kids up to? MAX He'll tell you. NOODLES Me, him, Cockeye and Patsy, we're working together. FARTFACE Bugsy'll flatten you. Besides, I don't put up with no trouble on my beat. NOODLES You'll put up, and you'll shut up. You hear nothing, and you see nothing. Just like you did for Bugsy. MAX Shit! PEGGY Don't get upset. That makes it worse. It can happen the first time. MAX It's them two talking out there. NOODLES Can't you see you're ruining the mood? We made our deal. So take a walk. PEGGY Come here, honey. Feel good, bubeleh? FARTFACE He'll never get it up. PEGGY Relax. Okay. Calm down, calm down. Okay. Okay, come here. DEBORAH I'm glad the baby's better. BECKY Happy Pesach, Deborah. DEBORAH Happy Pesach, Becky. FAT MOE Hurry. We're gonna be late. There's Deborah. DEBORAH Sorry. Mama needed help. DEBORAH'S DAD Good girl. I just locked up, and I'm giving you the keys. DEBORAH I thought I'd just practice my dance routines. All right? DEBORAH'S DAD Make sure you don't let the goyim in. DEBORAH Okay, bye. FAT MOE See you later, Debbie. Bye. AMAPOLA MUSIC. DEBORAH Get down off of there, roach. That record's just like Ex-Lax. Every time I put it on, you have to go to the bathroom. What are you doing? NOODLES Give me a drink. DEBORAH We're closed. Nice people don't drink on Pesach. They go to the synagogue. NODDLES So, what are you doing here? DEBORAH Somebody's got to keep an eye on the place. There are a lot of thieves out there. One could get into your house. NOODLES Especially if you leave the door open. DEBORAH You can pray here too. Here or in the synagogue, to God it's the same difference. Come over here and sit down. "My beloved is white and ruddy. His skin is as the most fine gold. His cheeks are as a bed of spices." Even though he hasn't washed since last December. "His eyes are as the eyes of doves. His body is as bright ivory. His legs are as pillars of marble." In pants so dirty they stand by themselves. "He is altogether lovable." But he'll always be a two-bit punk... ...so he'll never be my beloved. What a shame. KISS Somebody's there. NOODLES There ain't nobody. It's Max. DEBORAH So that's who it was. MAX (OFF) Noodles! DEBORAH Go on, run. Your mother's calling you. MAX (OFF) Noodles! NOODLES Just gonna go see what he wants. You been here long? MAX No. NOODLES Were you in there? MAX You're one lousy kisser. I seen you go in there after that ball-buster. Here's the stuff from last night. We got 4 for the silverware, 6 for the typewriter. Lipschitz wouldn't cough up any more. We gotta get somebody else. I came to divvy up. NOODLES Tomorrow, with the others. MAX I also came to pick you up. NOODLES I can't come right now. MAX The houses, the stores are all empty. We got our pick. You pick that. NOODLES Yeah. MAX Some partner I got. Have fun. BUGSY How's it going, boys? MAX Who's that? NOODLES Bugsy. BUGSY I hear you guys are in business for yourselves now. I hear youse are doing real good. Ain't you gonna introduce me to your friend here? I'll introduce myself. Excuse the glove. BUGSY GANG MEMBER Son of a bitch! BUGSY That's my cut. You don't work for me, you don't work for no one. MAX I don't like bosses. BUGSY You was better off you stayed in the Bronx. MAX It would have been better for you too. I'm gonna kill him one of these days. NOODLES Yeah? Meantime it looks like he's killed us. Deborah, open up the door. Deborah, open up the door. Deborah. AL CAPUANO That stuff, is it ready? FOREMAN We're loading it. AL CAPUANO Che cazzo succede down here? FRED CAPUANO AL, we got the big boys with us today. JOHNNY CAPUANO They wanna work for us. MAX Doing what Bugsy did. We want his job. FRED CAPUANO Do you get that? DOMINIC We the best escorts you ever gonna get. AL CAPUANO A fangulo a ma, escort your mother's ass out of here. MAX Okay. Let's go, Noodles. We'll peddle your invention somewhere else. FRED CAPUANO Hey, wait a minute. What invention? MAX You ship your stuff by the river, right? AL CAPUANO Sometimes. MAX And when you get caught, you throw the cases overboard. DOMINIC You lose the whole shipment. AL CAPUANO So? NOODLES For 10 percent, we'll save it all for you. AL CAPUANO What do you got, a submarine? DOMINIC We got salt. FRED CAPUANO You got what? PATSY Me and the boys are rolling salts. COCKEYE We need 3 tons of salt per shipment. AL CAPUANO Get the fuck out of here. Go back to school where you belong. FRED CAPUANO What is it with all this salt? MAX Hey, hey, we got salt on our noodles. Show 'em. NOODLES This is full of salt. All right, come here. AL CAPUANO So? DOMINIC Keep your shirt on. NOODLES We gotta wait for the salt to dissolve. COCKEYE Well? DOMINIC Hey, what's wrong? PATSY Hey, look. DOMINIC (OFF) Wow! PATSY Great! DOMINIC Look at that! PATSY It's great. DOMINIC Noodles. PATSY Look. NOODLES I see 'em! What did I tell you? MAX Yeah. Yeah! Hooray. Hooray for us! COCKEYE We did it. NOODLES Come here, Max. MAX We did it. NOODLES No, Max, no! Max. Max. Max! Max! MAX What would you do without me? There. From here on, we establish the shared funds of the gang. They belong to all of us together and to none of us alone. And we solemnly swear to put in percent of everything we make. Agreed? DOMINIC Agreed. PATSY Agreed. COCKEYE Agreed. NOODLES Agreed. DOMINIC I wanna take another peek. RAILWAYMAN (OFF) Announcing the departure of... ...the Lackawanna Railroad, Hudson Valley Express, Poughkeepsie... ...AIbany, Utica, and Buffalo. All aboard. MAX This goes to Fat Moe. We don't tell him what it's for. And he gives it back only when we're all together. Agreed? DOMINIC COCKEYE PATSY (OFF) Agreed. NOODLES Agreed. DOMINIC Bugsy's coming! Run! SHOT SHOT DOMINIC (Cont.) Noodles. I slipped. NOODLES Schmuck. MAX SEES INSCRIPTION YOUR YOUNGEST & STRONGEST WILL FALL BY THE SWORD NOODLES SEES INSCRIPTION YOUR YOUNGEST & STRONGEST WILL FALL BY THE SWORD CEMETARY CARETAKER Wanna go in? NOODLES Yeah. CEMETARY CARETAKER You a relative? NOODLES An uncle. CEMETARY CARETAKER It's open. MUSIC STARTS & STOPS AS DOOR IS OPENED & CLOSED "Erected to their everlasting memory by their friend and brother... ...David Aaronson, 1967." HIPPIES AT RAILWAY STATION Jimi Hendrix FRISBEE MAX Can I take that for you, sir? Your limousine is waiting. NOODLES Maxie. MAX How are you, uncle? You're looking good. NOODLES You're looking a little better. Come on. Better get you off the streets. NOODLES Some limousine. MAX What are you talking, huh? We own the company now. It's a good cover. It pays off too. NOODLES My mother wrote me you was in the body-snatching business. I appreciate everything you did for my family. MAX Forget it. It's your dough. It's all down in black and white in the company books. You're the company. You and Patsy and Cockeye. Gravediggers and partners. Hey, enough of this. Business before pleasure. We got a rush job. Here. Come here. Look at this. Come here. Sudden death. Fucking tragedy, huh? 26 years old. NOODLES 26? What a shame. MAX Great stiff. She died of an overdose. GIRL IN BACK OF HEARSE And I'm ready for another. MAX Pump the life into her. You didn't turn pansy in there, did you? There you go. Turning over in the grave. They do it every time. GIRL IN BACK OF HEARSE Don't worry. A pansy he ain't. NOODLES Thanks. MAX You're welcome, Noodles. Whoops. Sorry. GIRL IN BACK OF HEARSE Thanks. Good night. MAX Hey, you want a little pick-me-up? GIRL IN BACK OF HEARSE No, thanks. I've had mine. MAX Did you give her your all? NOODLES What do you think? You bet I did. POSH GENTLEMAN Wait till you see this place. MAX It's over here. NOODLES Where we going? MAX To a place that never closes. Whoops. Watch yourself. NOODLES What's this? MAX Our place. We got the hottest spot in town. This is the real Fat Moe's. Get rid of that rag, will you? What do you think? NOODLES It's beautiful. MAX You like it? NOODLES Beautiful. Beautiful. GIRL KISSING COCKEYE Hey, give me that. PATSY Noodles. MAX Patsy, look. PATSY Look who's here. NOODLES Come here, son of a bitch. PATSY Come here! Come here! You look fantastic. COCKEYE Wait a minute. PATSY (OFF) How you doing? NOODLES Look how big you got. PATSY Me? COCKEYE Noodles. Oh, God. Noodles! MAX Number three coming through. PATSY Let's have a toast, for chrissakes! COCKEYE You look like shit. NOODLES I just got out of prison. MAX Nice guy. PATSY Hey, Noodles, get a load of this. Hey, scotch heating. COCKEYE Yeah, a buck a cup. NOODLES A buck a cup? MAX Yeah. NOODLES How much it cost us? MAX Costing us? A dime, including overhead. FAT MOE Hey, Noodles. NOODLES Fat Moe. You look terrific. Look like you lost an ounce or two. FAT MOE You think I'm gonna lose hemorrhoids. COCKEYE Can't recognize him without an apron. MAX L 'Chaim. NOODLES PATSY COCKEYE FAT MOE L 'Chaim. COCKEYE Welcome home. MAX What kind of maitre d' are you? You don't even show a guy around. OTHERS (OFF) Yeah. What's with you? FAT MOE I didn't know. I'm sorry. NOODLES You're some bunch of shtunks. You don't come up and get me. COCKEYE He's the shtunk. PATSY He said you weren't out till Monday. MAX You get him the next time he gets out. NOODLES God forbid. God forbid. PEGGY Come on, let's see if you can guess who it is. NOODLES Charlotte russe. With a little too much whipped cream. Peggy. PEGGY Hey, you watch it, now. And my prices, they've gone up. I work in a high-class joint now. And I get paid by the pound. PATSY My Peggy, she's worth every penny of it too, my red-hot mama. MAX Come on, come on. MAX Timber! You've seen your old pals, now I want you to meet some new ones. NOODLES I'll see you later. MAX You gonna lay here all night or what? Cockeye wanted to play with the band. I'm serious. Come on. DEBORAH Aren't you going to say hello? NOODLES Hello. AMAPOLA MUSIC. NOODLES (Cont.) Your brother's a real friend. He's a romantic. Max tell you I was getting out today? DEBORAH Max? No. NOODLES You remembered yourself? DEBORAH No, Moe. It's always Moe. NOODLES Yeah. You weren't counting the days? DEBORAH Of course I was. 4344, 4343. I lost track at 3000. NOODLES That wasn't my choice. Yes, it was. It still is. Did you come here to welcome me back at least? DEBORAH I still live here. I was on my way out. Moe said I should say hello. NOODLES I hope Moe didn't have to bend your arm or anything. DEBORAH No. Welcome back, Noodles. MAX Hey, Noodles. NOODLES You dancing? DEBORAH Every night at the Palace Theatre. I've made some progress since I danced here among the brooms and the empties. You can come spy on me if you like. If you have time. NOODLES Every night. MAX Noodles. DEBORAH Go on, Noodles, your mother's calling you. It's good to see you again, Noodles. NOODLES (TO HIMSELF) My pleasure. MAX Did you get the wine? COCKEYE Dago Red. The best. PATSY How you doing? FRANKIE There they are. The four horsemen of the apocalypse. Did you see that movie, Joe? It's a good movie. Max, how are you? MAX Good to see you. FRANKIE This must be Noodles. MAX Noodles, say hello to Mr. Monaldi. FRANKIE Hi, how are you? NOODLES All right. FRANKIE Nice to meet you. You don't have to call me Mr. Monaldi. I like my friends and people I respect to call me Frankie. Come on, sit down. Get some chairs and some glasses. Sit down, relax. You're home now. This is my very dear friend Joe. He came from Detroit to ask me to do him a favor. And I wanna do it for him. I don't have to tell you who Joe is, how far he got, or how far he'll get. He's not only my dear friend, he's my brother. JOE I'll tell you the truth. Even a Jew can't eat this shit. I mean, the mustard doesn't even help. These guys with you? FRANKIE I told you these fellas are with me. You could trust them. You're in good hands. Just tell them what you want them to do. JOE Move some diamonds from Detroit. Kid stuff. NOODLES Why us then? If it's kid stuff, why not have the kids from Detroit do it? FRANKIE Excuse me, Noodles. He means that it's something that's very simple. But for now he needs kids from outside to handle it. He just found out they're moving these diamonds to Holland in a few days. So it's something came up right away. You understand? Hey, Joe. Tell these guys the story about the pussy being insured. What is it? Tell these guys how you stumbled on this whole thing. Tell them the story. Come on. Pussy insurance. The insurance pussies. Tell them that story. JOE Life is stranger than shit, that's all. It's a pisser. No big story. I got this insurance agent, this Jew kid named David. He conned me into every policy in the world. Every policy, name it. Dogs, house, wife, life, anything. I'm drinking with the boys one night, he comes in with his wife... ...a brunette with a nice ass who works for a jeweler. And he's still on the hustle, this guy. So I wink at the guys, I say, "Look... ...the most serious policy, you don't have me covered for." He goes, "What's that, Joe?" "Cock insurance." "You make me a policy that when it don't work, I get a payment... ...I'll write out a check now." He thinks, and he says, "I don't know if the actuality gauges govern this... ...but we can make a policy. But you gotta guarantee you're in good health now." I says, "Look, leave her with me. Come back and see if it stands up. If it stands up, you know I'm in good health." The jerk leaves her. I screw her. Not only that, she likes it. And she tells me when her boss, the jeweler... ...is shipping stones to Holland... ...where he keeps his stash in a drawer in the safe. Everything. Can't ask for more, right? Except, one better. I never paid the first premium on the new cock policy. MAX Cock insurance. JOE Life is funnier than shit. But... ...be easy with the girl. I mean that. Be easy with the girl. CAROL Oh, my God! MAX Open it! JEWELLER Who's gotten in? COCKEYE Had to go and be a hero, huh? MAX Open it. No. Open it! CAROL No, don't hurt him! Don't hurt him! MAX Get this bitch out of here. CAROL You animal! You asshole! Come on, hit me. NOODLES What do you mean? CAROL Hit me. NOODLES What, are you crazy? Straighten up and fly right. CAROL I'm all right. Let me make it look real. Make it look real. NOODLES Knock it off. CAROL I'm all right. Let go. NOODLES Come on, cut the act. CAROL Hit me! COCKEYE She said hit her. Go ahead, rap her in the mouth. CAROL Hit me! NOODLES I'll hit you! You bitch! CAROL You animal! MAX Put a cork in her. CAROL No. No. Don't. Don't. No! No! You dirty bastards! Bastards! MAX Try the secret compartment. Attaboy. Thanks. PATSY Nice matzo balls. Beautiful. Look at that. MAX Okay, better wrap them up. We're going. You coming? NOODLES Coming. PATSY Morning. JOE You get the stones? Pay him. Any trouble? PATSY No trouble. Kid stuff. MAX You okay? NOODLES How come you didn't tell me? MAX Being inside can change you. I'd already made the deal with Frankie to get rid of Joe. With a man like Frankie Monaldi you don't say, "yes" and then, "no." I could not take the chance that you'd change your mind. You understand. NOODLES You're right. I would have said, no. MAX Frankie is as big as they come. He's got the combination in his hand. NOODLES If we're not careful, he'll have us in his hand. MAX You don't get nowhere alone. NOODLES I thought you didn't like bosses. It sounded like a good idea then. It still is. MAX Let's just think about it Noodles. They're gonna ask us to come in with them. There's a lot in it for us. NOODLES Today they asked us to get rid of Joe. Tomorrow they ask me to get rid of you. Is that okay with you? 'Cause it's not okay with me. MAX All right. Let's just forget about it. Wanna go for a swim? NOODLES Yeah, let's go for a swim. MAX All right, what are you doing? COCKEYE Hey, Noodles. Don't fuck around, Noodles. MAX Noodles, what are you doing? COCKEYE Hey! You crazy? MAX Shit. Asshole! Can't believe you did this! TELEVISION BROADCAST District Attorney James Lister was killed in an explosion of a car... ...belonging to Secretary of Commerce Bailey as he left the secretary's estate. Mr. Lister, killed in the blast, was scheduled to testify... ...in Washington on Thursday before a Senate committee. A committee investigating what has been called "The Bailey Scandal." A team of detectives has been assigned to the case. Secretary Bailey was not available for any statement at this time. FAT MOE Did you know those guys? TELEVISION BROADCAST offices of his legal advisor, Irving Gold... ...in hopes of getting some comment. Mr. Gold, you're aware that District Attorney Lister... ...is the second witness in the Bailey Scandal to meet a sudden end. The first was Thomas Finney, undersecretary of commerce... ...who fell to his death from his th-floor office a month ago. Is there a connection...? FAT MOE Take the money and run, Noodles. What's keeping you here? TELEVISION BROADCAST The only remaining witness is the man who... ...rightly or wrongly has given his name to this affair, Secretary Bailey. NOODLES Curious. TELEVISION BROADCAST The secretary has no worries. If he has no worries, why has he retreated to his place on Long Island? He's preparing his attack on the questions... ...he will be asked by the committee. I'd call them accusations more than questions. He has no worries. The public does. Particularly, in view of the rumors about rigged contracts, bribery... ...the international Mafia. Especially those dealing with the illegal use... ...of the Transport union pension funds. Could you tell us anything about that? JIMMY (ON TELEVISION) Gentlemen, I deny all of these rumors and allegations against my organization. Our hands have always been and will continue to remain clean. In my entire life, I've fought to keep the American labor movement clear... NOODLES Him, I know. JIMMY (ON TELEVISION) forced speculation, criminal elements... ...or corrupt politicians. If any mistakes have... NOODLES He's still giving out the same old bullshit. JIMMY (ON TELEVISION) If any guilt at all exists in this situation, it lies elsewhere. CHICKEN JOE What's this I've been reading about you in the newspapers? Inflammatory words from a union boss? JIMMY You still won't come and stop the workers or the social movement. CHICKEN JOE Listen to me, you socialist asshole! We don't give a good fart about the socialist workers and their movements. We want you out of the factory so we can get the furnaces working again. This is the last offer you're gonna get. You want to sign it or what? JIMMY Tell your bosses they can wipe their ass with it. CHICKEN JOE Fill her up. This is my last... CROWNING Hold it, boys. Don't shoot. It's me, Crowning. CHICKEN JOE Crowning. CROWNING Yeah. That'll do, boys. CHICKEN JOE What'll do? We almost got the kid where we want him. MAX And we got the boss where we want him. PATSY Easy. Easy. MAX Put 'em down. CROWNING Put your guns away, boys. PATSY Just swapping prisoners. COCKEYE Fair trade, huh, chickenhead? Union boy over here for Mr. Boss Man. CHICKEN JOE Well, look who's here. Fat Moe's boneyard boys. MAX Which reminds me. How's that cancer in your gut coming along, Chicken Joe? Untie him. CHICKEN JOE I don't take orders from you. NOODLES We're not asking you to take orders. We're telling you. Now go ahead, untie him. Untie him. CROWNING Untie him. JIMMY Who are you? Who's paying you? COCKEYE I think this is gonna piss you off, Mac. I think it's those dirty politician friends of yours. JIMMY Yeah? Well, you crawl back and tell 'em we don't want you in with us. Our fight's got nothing to do with liquor and prostitution and dope. MAX Well, you'd better get used to the idea, pal. This country is still growing up. Certain diseases it's better to have when you're still young. JIMMY You boys ain't a mild case of the measles. You're the plague. Bastards like him are immune. That's the difference between us and them! NOODLES Take it easy. The difference is, they'll always win. And you'll keep getting it up the ass. CROWNING Sooner than you think. FEMALE REPORTER Chief Aiello, moving policemen into the factory came as a surprise. The press, the unions, especially the strikers. CHIEF AIELLO What did you want, a declaration of war? Ours was a peaceable operation. MALE REPORTER 1 Wasn't that contrary to new union laws? CHIEF AIELLO I'm chief of police, not chief of people. MALE REPORTER 2 Was there any violence to justify...? CHIEF AIELLO My motto is: "Prevention, not repression." FEMALE REPORTER You let scabs move in and work. CHIEF AIELLO Young lady, you wanna talk to me, call them "unemployed workers." With your permission, I'll take these flowers to my missis before they wilt. Or maybe you heard. I'm the father of a baby boy. MALE REPORTER 1 We heard he's the youngest stockholder in that factory you occupied. CHIEF AIELLO What'd you mean by that? MALE REPORTER 1 They say management expressed their thanks with a present for the baby. CHIEF AIELLO You know, slander is a serious offense. Especially from a hack reporter. You wanna find out how serious? But since this is my first boy after four girls... ...I'll declare amnesty. Behave yourself. Go. THIEVING MAGPIES MUSIC. MRS AIELLO Thank you. CHIEF AIELLO He's eating? MRS AIELLO For five. CHIEF AIELLO For five? Well, why not. You could feed an army with these milk plants. We could open up a dairy. Oh, hey. Che bella. Who loves you? Who loves you? I love you. And I love you. And I love you. Lucy! Don't you have to feed him at 6 o'clock? MRS AIELLO Come in. Oh, here he is now. CHIEF AIELLO That's my son. That's my son. That's my son! That's my son! Jesus Christ, they change fast. Yeah, but he looks like my old man. Yeah, yeah, look, same eyes. And look, the same devilish pride. Hey. Hey, hey. Did you see his dickey? MRS AIELLO Vincent. CHIEF AIELLO What? MRS AIELLO The girls. CHIEF AIELLO The girls! Sooner or later you have to learn that after me, the boss in the house is him. He's got balls like his papa. Hey! NURSE Let me have him. CHIEF AIELLO No, no, no. I'll do this. I'll do this, huh. Hey. No, no, no. Look. Hey, hey. Let Papa change you. Come on, everything will be swell. Come on, come on, come on. What the fuck is this? What is this? Huh? What's that? Look! NURSE It's the right number. CHIEF AIELLO The right number? I'll break your goddamn neck! Find my son, or I'll burn down this building. Hello! Hello. Would you shut up? No, hey, no. Wait, wait. I'm not talking to you. Well, who's this? Never mind... To who am I talking? Where the hell are you? My son, where is he? NOODLES Where do you think? He's in the maternity ward. He never left. He got restless, so he wanted to change his bed. The other kids got the same idea, so they wanted to change their beds. You got 30, 40 screaming babies jumping from one bed to another... ...switching tags, so now we do have a real problem. CHIEF AIELLO Piece of shit whoever you are! What the fuck?! I want my son! NOODLES Luckily, we were there to see that everything was under control. If you want, we can put everything back. Except you gotta meet us halfway. CHIEF AIELLO Tell me! NOODLES Why do you give a fuck who wins the strike? CHIEF AIELLO That's got nothing to do with me! What did I do? NOODLES First of all, you let the scabs in. Second, you've got the cops in there protecting them. CHIEF AIELLO I'm a cop! NOODLES All right, shut the fuck up! Now listen very carefully. Call off your dogs and let the strikers work it out with the bosses. CHIEF AIELLO I want my son! NOODLES Do that and we'll give you the kid's number. If you don't, look for your kid yourself. So, what is it gonna be? CHIEF AIELLO Okay. I'll call my men off today. NOODLES Attaboy. You know, for a rotten bastard son of a bitch... ...you're not as stupid as I thought. We'll be in touch. CHIEF AIELLO When will you call? NOODLES Don't worry, don't worry. We'll be in touch with you. Bye. MAX So? NOODLES We got a deal. MAX To a very smooth talker. ALL Yeah. Mazel. At least. NOODLES Where's that switch list? PATSY The switch list? NOODLES Yeah. PATSY I can't find it. MAX What? PATSY I can't find it. NOODLES What'd you do with it? PATSY I think I dumped it. MAX What a yutz. NOODLES Oh, Pat. PATSY Wait a minute, listen. Listen, Noodles, Noodles, wait. I remember. The boys' numbers was odd... Even, and the girls' was odd. NOODLES It's simple. COCKEYE You took good stock. NOODLES Hey, let's give him an even number. Eight. Let's pick an eight. PEGGY Eight. PATSY Yeah, it's a good number. COCKEYE Wait. What about the other pischers? MAX We're better than fate. We give some the good life, give it to others up the ass. PEGGY All right, boys, let's settle up. It's Saturday. COCKEYE Settle-shmettle, Peggy I'm gonna take mine out in trade. PEGGY You're such a nudge. PATSY You know what? You know, I wish I was switched when I was a kid. NOODLES What makes you think you weren't? COCKEYE I don't believe it. Hey, you guys, come here. Take a look at who's over here. NOODLES (OFF - TO PEGGY) The place is yours MAX That suit you, Peg? PEGGY Fine, Max. MAX What've you got? COCKEYE Over there. MAX Well, what...? Holy shit! Noodles! Noodles! Come here, come here. Look. The blond by the piano. NOODLES Who's that? MAX Who is that? You and this broad were practically engaged at one point. COCKEYE Oh, beat me. Oh, I love it. NOODLES Who was it? The Detroit cock-squasher? MAX Yeah. Peggy. NOODLES That's not her. She looks different. MAX You know that platinum blond. She's by the table. See her? Call her in, will you? PEGGY Carol. MAX Carol, whatever. Just tell her there's a bunch of her old friends here. PEGGY Carol. Carol! MAX Noodles, come here. PEGGY Somebody here wants to see you. CAROL Who? PEGGY You know these guys? CAROL No. I don't think so. No. No. I'd remember a bunch of good-lookers like these. Oh, well, how could I forget. There was... There was only one of you I got to know personally, though. MAX Which one? Let's see how good a memory you've got for faces. (unbuttons fly) CAROL (TO MAX) You. MAX No. Him. NOODLES We've been hanging out so long we're starting to look alike. Hanging out. CAROL Charmed. You can call me Carol. We've already met. Pleasure. MAX The pleasure... ...is all mine. PATSY So you left Detroit, huh? PEGGY Her and her husband just come in on weekends. COCKEYE Yeah, beats the seashore. PEGGY She takes on guys while her hubby watches through the peephole. COCKEYE Beats the hell out of the movies. PATSY I wonder what that jerk is up to in his cubbyhole? NOODLES He must be wondering where is his fucking wife. CAROL Why don't we make it a threesome, huh? MAX Can't you see he's got other plans for tonight? CAROL Well, bring her along. We'll make it a foursome. NOODLES I'm not that kind of guy. I'm afraid if I give you a good crack in the mouth, you'd probably like it. Have a good night, fellas. See you later. DEBORAH Been waiting long? NOODLES All my life. AMAPOLA MUSIC NOODLES (Cont.) You wanted a place by the ocean. I had it opened. It was closed for the season. All these tables are for two people. Pick whatever one you want. DEBORAH I like this one. NOODLES Here, sit down. MAITRE D' Boeuf a la mode. Blanquette de veau. DEBORAH I'll have the asperges sauce vinaigrette and then a chateaubriand. MAITRE D' Pommes frites? DEBORAH Nature. MAITRE D' Comme dessert? DEBORAH I'll decide later. MAITRE D' Monsieur? NOODLES I'll have the same. WINE WAITER For the wine? DEBORAH You decide. I'll just have water. NOODLES You decide. WINE WAITER Thank you. NOODLES You've been around. Where'd you learn them parlez-vous francais dishes? Who's teaching you that stuff? DEBORAH You mean a sugar daddy, who tries to teach me how to act? I read books. I want to know everything. Doesn't it make sense to have plans? NOODLES Yeah, it does. What about me? Am I in any of these plans? DEBORAH Noodles... You're the only person that I have ever... NOODLES Ever what? Go ahead. Ever what? DEBORAH That I ever cared about. But you'd lock me up and throw away the key, wouldn't you? NOODLES Yeah. Yeah, I guess so. DEBORAH Yeah... And the thing is, I probably wouldn't even mind. NOODLES So? DEBORAH So I got to get to where I'm going. NOODLES And where's that? DEBORAH To the top. NOODLES Now you sound just like Maxie. Youse both alike, that's why you hate each other. DEBORAH Do you want me to leave? NOODLES No, I don't want you to leave. DEBORAH You dancing? NOODLES You asking? DEBORAH I'm asking. NOODLES I'm dancing. To keep from going crazy, you have to cut yourself off from the outside world. Just not think about it. Yet there were years that went by, it seemed like... ...no time at all, because you're not doing anything. There were two things I couldn't get out of my mind. One was Dominic. The way he said, "I slipped," just before he died. The other was you. How you used to read me your Song of Songs, remember? How beautiful are your feet In sandals, O prince's daughter I used to read the Bible every night. Every night I used to think about you. Your navel is a bowl Well-rounded with no lack of wine Your belly, a heap of wheat Surrounded with lilies Your breasts Clusters of grapes Your breath, sweet-scented as apples Nobody's gonna love you the way I loved you. At times I couldn't stand it. I used to think of you. I'd think, "Deborah lives. She's out there. She exists." And that would get me through it all. You know how important that was to me? DEBORAH I'm leaving tomorrow to go to Hollywood. I wanted to see you tonight to tell you. KISS DEBORAH (Cont.) No. No! No! No. No. Please, no. No, please. No! No! No! No, please! No, no! Please, no, no. No. No! NOODLES Deborah. DEBORAH Get away! Get away! CHAUFFEUR I'll be right back. NOODLES Take her home. Take her home. INTERMISSION PUNCHBAG MAX Well... ...look who's back. NOODLES What's this? MAX It's a throne. It was a gift to a pope. Cost me 800 bucks. CAROL It's from the 17th century. NOODLES So, what are you doing with it? MAX I'm sitting on it. NOODLES You got any coffee around? FAT MOE Yes. NOODLES Thanks. (stirs coffee for 60 secs) MAX While you were on vacation, we were working overtime. The union paid off. That's your share. PATSY Yeah. Even that geek. You know, Jimmy "Clean Hands." He respects us. I shed a little blood for the cause. FAT MOE Here, it's all in the papers. Morning Telegraph, they didn't like it. It says, "Underworld joins strikers in brutal battle." But The Post, they liked it. "Ends justify means in decisive gangland encounter." And they kvetched about the Atlantic City job. COCKEYE Newspaper guys never know what the fuck they want. NOODLES Well, you could have looked for me. MAX We did. Cockeye found you at the Chink's. So doped up you didn't even recognize him. COCKEYE There you were. You called me "Deborah." NOODLES Go fuck yourself. Mind your own business. MAX We do our business together, and broads do not get in the way... ...and you know it! NOODLES Yeah? MAX Yeah. NOODLES What's she doing here? It ain't Saturday. She should be screwing in Detroit. CAROL Well, she's screwing here now. And only with Max. NOODLES Oh, yeah? With her husband peeping through? CAROL No, I left him. NOODLES You live with her and you tell me not to mess with broads. MAX You forget one thing. What? I don't give a fuck about her. CAROL Max... MAX Shut up! Shut up! NOODLES Hey, Maxie, tell me something. What'll you spend your honeymoon on? A cathouse? MAX Shut the fuck up! Shut up! Just shut up! You want me to dump her? You want me to kick her fucking ass out of here? Want me to kick her ass out or what? You want me to kick...? Get the fuck out! Get the fuck out! Get out! Gonna tell me I don't have a way with women? NOODLES Hello. JIMMY (OFF) This is Jimmy. Who 's this, Max? NOODLES No, it's Noodles. JIMMY Okay, listen. We're gonna need you guys today. I'm gonna be making a tough speech, and I think you... CHICKEN JOE Go, go! CROWNING Start the engine. I'll be right with you. Mr. Gallagher wants you to know he appreciates what you did. To show his appreciation... Here's an envelope for the both of you. If we gotta complete the job, I'll let you know. PATSY Wiped out by a blast of Cordon Rouge. MAX What would Crowning and his bosses say after that? Never be afraid of you, then. JIMMY They're still not afraid of me. It was you boys that scared them off. SHARKEY And you didn't want these guys. You're lucky you got party leaders... ...like me who care about the union. MAX The strike is settled. We won. That's what counts. Am I right, Jim? NOODLES It was tough for Jimmy not to be there to sign the contract. JIMMY No. What's tough is, you did more in a night than I could in two years of talking. NOODLES Forget it. SHARKEY To the hottest newcomer... ...in American unions, Jimmy Conway. MAX (OFF) Now you're talking. SHARKEY Roll out the barrel. And God bless. MAX Drink up, Jim. Suck it right down. NURSE You must be crazy giving him drinks. We're going to operate. JIMMY What's the rush? They already told me I'd be a gimp the rest of my life. SHARKEY Don't worry, with one leg a little shy, you're gonna take giant steps. JIMMY Yeah. And always one step right behind you, Sharkey? MAX Make sure they work on the right leg, Jim. It's only blood, huh? SHARKEY You boys got yourself a real martyr for a friend. Make it work for you. PATSY Yeah, but what are we going to do with a martyr? SHARKEY Times change. Prohibition won't last much longer. Take it from me... ...a lot of you will be out of work. MAX Go on, Mr. Sharkey. We're interested. SHARKEY You ever think of setting yourselves up in business? All those trucks used to haul liquor, soon be selling them for nothing. I'm talking about hundreds of vehicles controlled by a national organization. And supported by a powerful union headed by Jimmy. Whatever you ask, there's no way he can turn you down. COCKEYE You gotta be kidding, Sharkey. Jimmy "Clean Hands" in business with us? SHARKEY They won't be clean for long, with the hands he'll shake. Everything in good time. NOODLES We're not interested. MAX What's the matter, you got a problem? We got plenty of money tucked away. Why not invest it? SHARKEY I'll put the party behind you. And I got friends in high places. NOODLES I'm not interested, and I don't trust politicians. MAX You still think like some street schmuck. If we'd listened to you, we'd still be rolling drunks. NOODLES You broke? MAX Don't bust my balls. I am talking about real money. NOODLES This is real money to me. It's a lot of money. You want any of it? MAX You carry that stink of the street with you the rest of your life. NOODLES I like that. It makes me feel good. I like the smell of it. It opens up my lungs. And it gives me a hard-on. SHARKEY You're carrying dead weight, Maxie. One of these days, you're gonna have to dump it. NOODLES Let me know when you're gonna dump me. Meanwhile, I'll be in Florida. I got a yen for the seashore. MAX Listen, I was thinking it over... ...and I guess I kind of got a yen for the seashore myself. NOODLES You wanna go swimming? MAX Yeah. Yeah, let's go for a swim. NEWSPAPER SALESMAN Read all about it! Read all about it! NOODLES Hey, Maxie. Max. How much money we got put away? MAX Why? NOODLES Because we're unemployed. MAX About a million bucks. CAROL Oh, yeah? Where'd you put it? MAX In my underwear. CAROL I'd have found it there. NOODLES We gotta reorganize, Max. And I got a couple of good ideas. MAX Me too. EVE If I had a million bucks, I'd take it easy. MAX We'll take it easy when we got 20. Fifty. NOODLES Where you gonna get that? MAX Right here. NOODLES What's that? MAX It's a dream. A dream I've been dreaming all my life. I swear to God, you and me together, we can make it come true. NOODLES What is it? MAX The Federal Reserve Bank. It's the biggest step we can take, Noodles. NOODLES You're really crazy. MAX Don't you ever say that to me. Don't ever say that to me again! CAROL What chance is there that a crazy thing like this might succeed? NOODLES Don't ask me, ask Max. CAROL You know as well as I do that this is suicide, pure and simple, for everyone. NOODLES Yeah, well, don't tell me, tell him. You got your own methods. CAROL I tried. He doesn't want to screw anymore. All he thinks about is this job. Tear gas, hostages, now he's gonna do this. He's gonna do it with or without you. Noodles, we've never liked each other. We put up with each other for Max. So why don't we get together once... ...and do something for him. And after that... ...we can go back to being enemies. You know, if you were all in jail first... ...there wouldn't be any bank job. I got the idea from your friend Max. NOODLES What do you mean? CAROL He laughs at you. He makes fun of you. He says Eve has got you by the balls. Every time you walk past this place, you shit in your pants. You'd do anything for the cops to pick you up so you wouldn't have to do this. Well, then do it. Do it. Put him in jail. Put him in jail. Not long. Just long enough so he can get the idea out of his mind. If you can't stand being away from him, put yourself there too. Better off than being dead. You know what to do. And if you don't, I will. Get out! Take a cab. I'm busy. I got things to do. Get out. Noodles. Make up your mind fast, huh? PROHIBITION COFFIN EVE What's the matter? Aren't you having a good time? Why are you going out tonight? Why bother now that prohibition is almost over? NOODLES Everybody's selling. We got friends who wanna get rid of booze. Practically nothing. So we figured, why not. I'm gonna be gone for a while. EVE I'll be waiting at the hotel. I like it when you come home late and wake me up. NOODLES I'm not gonna be home tonight. I'm not gonna be home tomorrow either. EVE I thought these things only take a couple of hours. MAX Ladies and gents, I drink to the demise of Fat Moe's speakeasy. Who the hell wants to drink here legally anyway, am I right? Okay. Come on, Moe, set them up. Go on, get in there. Here's mud in your eye. Boys. Let's drink to our last shipment. There's more onboard tonight than just booze. It's 10 years of our lives. Ten years that were really worth living. PATSY Yeah. MAX Noodles. Noodles. L 'Chaim. NOODLES L 'Chaim. EVE How long will I have to wait? NOODLES A year and a half, more or less. Six months off for good behavior. EVE What are you gonna do? NOODLES Don't ask. OPERATOR (OFF) Operator. NOODLES Police, please. SERGEANT HALLORAN Fifth Precinct. Sergeant Halloran. Hello. Who's speaking? Can I help you? Hello. NOODLES I got a good tip for you. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK NOODLES Yeah, who is it? MAX It's Max. Open the door. What's the matter with you? You sick? NOODLES No, I'm fine. MAX You don't look it. Maybe you'd better stay home tonight, huh? PUNCHBAG NOODLES Why? (MAX TURNS PHONE ROUND) MAX You know, I've been watching you all night. And you've been drinking like a fish. Trying to get your courage up? We're only bringing in a shipment of booze. It's got so you're even scared to do that. Maybe you just better stay home tonight. With Eve. NOODLES Hey, Maxie, everywhere you go, I go too. Remember that. MAX Maybe Sharkey was right. Maybe I ought to just dump you. NOODLES You're really crazy. MAX Never say that. Don't say it! CAROL Max made fools of us, Noodles. He wanted to die. Did you know his old man died in the nut house? Max didn't want to end up the same way. So he put the idea in our heads to tip off the cops. And when they stopped the truck, Max started shooting first... ...just to get himself killed. NOODLES What is this? CAROL Opening night. Fifteen years ago. NOODLES Who's this? CAROL Patron saint of the place. Some actress. NOODLES Do you know her? CAROL No. NOODLES Hello, Deborah. Aren't you gonna say anything? DEBORAH What is someone supposed to say after... ...more than 30 years. NOODLES Well, how about, "How you doing? You're looking good." Or, "I was hoping I'd never see you again." DEBORAH I never thought I would. There's a difference. NOODLES At least you recognized me, that's something. DEBORAH Actresses have good memories. You want a drink? I'm having one. Margo. MARGO Yes, miss? DEBORAH That's all for now. You can go. MARGO All right, Miss. NOODLES She called you "Miss." You never got married? DEBORAH No. NOODLES You live alone? DEBORAH No. Where were you? NOODLES I was out of town. DEBORAH Have you been back long? NOODLES A couple of days. DEBORAH Are you staying? NOODLES That depends. DEBORAH Why do you want to see me? NOODLES Two reasons. First I wanted to see if you did the right thing, turning me down to become an actress. DEBORAH Well? NOODLES You did. You're terrific. "Age cannot wither her." It's like the play was written for you. DEBORAH What was the other reason? NOODLES The other reason... ...is to decide whether I should go to a party tomorrow night DEBORAH Party? NOODLES Yeah, on Long Island. A Secretary Bailey. DEBORAH Do you know Secretary Bailey? NOODLES No. But I was invited anyway. DEBORAH If you don't know each other, why were you invited? NOODLES I don't know. I thought you might know why. DEBORAH Me? Why me? NOODLES Because you know him. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK DEBORAH Who is it? DAVID (OFF) It's me, David. DEBORAH No, David. DAVID (OFF) Can I come in? DEBORAH No. Just wait outside, I'll call you. DAVID (OFF) Okay, I'll be right here. NOODLES What does Secretary Bailey want from me? DEBORAH You came to ask me that? NOODLES Why'd he send me an invitation? DEBORAH I don't know. Why should I know about your invitations? I don't know anything. What do you want from me? Why did you come here? I know nothing. NOODLES Now you're a lousy actress. Who is Secretary Bailey? DEBORAH Secretary Bailey is a rich businessman. He came to the United States as a starving immigrant and made a lot of money... ...in San Francisco and L.A., where he's lived for 30 years. NOODLES I know all that. It's all in the papers. What else is there? DEBORAH He married a very wealthy woman. They had a child. She died when the child was born. A few years ago, he went into politics. Moved here. NOODLES That's all past history. I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about now. DEBORAH Right now he's in trouble. NOODLES Why can't you just tell me you've been living with him all these years, and you're his lover. DEBORAH Age can wither me, Noodles. We're both getting old. All that we have left now are our memories. If you go to that party on Saturday night, you won't have those anymore. Tear up that invitation. There's an exit back this way. Noodles, go through it. Keep walking. Don't turn around. Please, Noodles. I'm begging you. Please. NOODLES Are you afraid that I'll turn into a pillar of salt? DEBORAH If you go out that door, yes. This is Secretary Bailey's son. His name's David, just like yours. NIGHT & DAY MUSIC. BUTLER (OFF) Please go in. SECRETARY BAILEY What are you waiting for? NOODLES I don't understand, Mr. Bailey. SECRETARY BAILEY Sit down, Noodles. Make yourself comfortable. I'm glad you accepted my invitation. NOODLES Well, I was curious. So many important people in one place. SECRETARY BAILEY Yes. Well, the rats usually desert a sinking ship. But in my case, they appear to be flocking onboard. NOODLES Yeah, well, I read about your troubles in the newspapers. But a man in your position, with all your power and all your privileges... ...has to assume a certain amount of responsibility... ...a certain amount of risk. Why'd you ask me to come here, Mr. Bailey? SECRETARY BAILEY That invitation doesn't mean a goddamn thing, and you know it. All that counts is what was in that suitcase. The money and the contract. NOODLES It didn't say who the contract was on, though. SECRETARY BAILEY Haven't you figured that out yet? NOODLES You, Mr. Bailey? I haven't had a gun in my hand for many, many years. My eyes aren't too good, even with my glasses. My hands shake. And I wouldn't want to miss. SECRETARY BAILEY Cut the bullshit, Noodles. I'm already a dead man. At least give me the chance to settle the debt that I owe to you. I'll never make it before the investigating committee. They're scared I'll implicate the whole bunch of 'em. They gotta get rid of me. Today is as good a day as any. You do it, Noodles. You're the only person I can accept it from. You see, I found out where you were. I brought you back here for this. To even the score between you and me. You can get out through there. It leads right down to the street. Nobody will see you. NOODLES I don't know what you're talking about. You don't owe me a thing. SECRETARY BAILEY Your eyes were too full of tears to see it wasn't me burned up on that street. It was somebody else. You were too shocked to realize that the cops were in on it too. That was a syndicate operation, Noodles. NOODLES You're crazy. SECRETARY BAILEY You said that to me once before, a long time ago. But my mind was never as clear as it was at that moment. I took away your whole life from you. I've been living in your place. I took everything. I took your money. I took your girl. All I left for you was 35 years of grief over having killed me. Now, why don't you shoot? (MEMORIES) NOODLES It's true, I have killed people, Mr. Bailey. Sometimes to defend myself. Sometimes for money. And many people used to come to us. Business partners, rivals... ...lovers. Some of the jobs we took, and some we didn't. Yours is one we would never touch, Mr Bailey. SECRETARY BAILEY Is this your way of getting revenge? NOODLES No. It's just the way I see things. YESTERDAY MUSIC. SECRETARY BAILEY It's 10:25 ...and I've got nothing left to lose. When you've been betrayed by a friend, you hit back. Do it. NOODLES You see, Mr. Secretary... ...I have a story also. A little simpler than yours. Many years ago I had a friend, a dear friend. I turned him in to save his life... ...but he was killed. But he wanted it that way. It was a great friendship. It went bad for him, and it went bad for me too. Good night, Mr. Bailey. I hope the investigation turns out to be nothing. It'd be a shame to see a lifetime of work go to waste. SUMMERTIME MUSIC. GARBAGE TRUCK GOD BLESS AMERICA MUSIC. OPIUM DEN (1933) SMILE